Are Canadian Schools Really Attempting to Hide Students' Gender Transitions From Their Parents?

The short answer is yes. The long answer - well, that's also yes...

There's been quite the hullabaloo in Canada since the Angus Reid Institute released its report in August which found that around 80% of parents would like the schools to notify them if their child is changing genders or pronouns in school. These results were fairly consistent among all demographics throughout the country (even those identifying as Liberal amounted to 69%). The only demographic that was a bit of an outlier was in the gender category where men and women were at 80% and 78% respectively, while the “prefer to self describe” crowd was at 18%. Not much of a surprise there, although they are a relatively tiny subsection.

Bottom line here is that parents want to know what is going on with their kids in the schools which have been entrusted with them. This result really shouldn't be surprising to anyone. In fact, I'm a little surprised that number isn't a fair bit higher.

So, why would this even be a question to begin with? I’ve always assumed the schools would be working with the parents to make sure the kids are succeeding. That’s always been our experience anyway. Don't they always let the parents know if little Johnny gets in a fight at lunchtime? Or if he decides to change from saxophone to tuba in the school band? Isn't there supposed to be an open line of communication to the parent at all times? Obviously the school wouldn't be hiding something so important as my child undergoing gender transition, would they?

When I heard that New Brunswick, and then Saskatchewan had crafted legislation that specifically mandated that not only should parents be informed of this, but that their permission should also be required for those wishing to change genders or pronouns under 16 years of age, I was more than a little curious about current legislation in other provinces, especially my own.

Since our Prime Minister seemed especially put out by Premier Higgs’ announcement, it's worthwhile looking at the federal position on this.

The following is from Canada's Public Health page under Questions and Answers: Gender Identity in Schools – What do I do if a student discloses a gender variant identity to me?

This site is set up in a question and answer format. It opens with this question and I've included an excerpt of the accompanying answer:

What do I do if a student discloses a gender variant identity to me?

Do not talk to anyone about their identity, including parents/caregivers, to whom they have not already disclosed their gender identity.

Here's another question on that page:

What can the schools do to support the parents/caregivers of gender variant youth?

I was very interested in the answer to this one but more than a little disappointed when I actually read it.

This is how it starts (emphasis in original):

Families are not always a safe place for gender variant youth. It is important not to involve the parents/caregivers of gender variant youth unless the youth themselves have already disclosed their identity to their families or you have a legal duty to report such as in the case of risk of self-harm. The gender variant youth may be put at risk within their homes if parents/caregivers who were unaware of their child’s identity are approached by the school.

So here we have the federal government’s take on this issue, even though education is firmly in the domain of the provinces.

It's noteworthy that the default assumption here is that families are not to be trusted with this information.

Contrary to our federal government’s position, I'm firmly of the opinion that the first assumption should always be that the kid's parents are there to help and support him/her. That should be the default, not the exception.

Since the federal government is very clear on its position, I decided to check my own province’s stance on this issue.

Southern Manitoba is one of the most conservative places in the country. The riding of Portage-Lisgar (where I live), is the riding that Maxime Bernier decided to run in during the last by-election here. I presume that's because he figured this would give him the best chance of being elected (he wasn't). In case you're interested, the People's Party came in a solid 2nd place.

With 17% of the vote.

The Conservatives got 65%.

To be fair, all of Manitoba isn't quite like this, though in the last two provincial elections, the Progressive Conservatives still ended up with about double the seats as the second place NDP (in the previous election it was almost triple). I only mention this to give you an idea of what the politics are like here.

The following is from Manitoba’s Education and Early Childhood Learning website, so this applies to school-age children from kindergarten through grade twelve. The document is called Guidelines for Supporting and Affirming Trans and Gender Diverse Students, which is an excerpt of the larger document entitled Supporting Transgender and Gender Diverse Students in Manitoba Schools.

The points are numbered in the actual document, so I've done that here as well. These are what you might call “the highlights” and I've italicized the pertinent bits. Just to be clear, I don't really have a problem with most of what's in here, but I (and evidently most other parents) do have a huge problem with a couple of issues. These issues need to be dealt with, and as they say - knowing is half the battle.

1. Support the student’s individual process: It is essential that the school division and school accept and support a student’s affirmation of their gender identity and do not require any particular substantiating evidence.

2. Respect students’ rights to confidentiality and privacy: All students must be able to decide what personal information they wish to share about themselves, with whom, and when.

3. Work with parents/guardians of trans and gender diverse students: It is the school’s duty to work to engage parents/guardians in schooling matters involving their child unless the school determines it is objectively not in the best interests of the student to do so.

4. Attend to requests for accommodation: Some trans and gender diverse students may feel that participating in sex-segregated school programs and activities or being in sex-segregated facilities (e.g., a washroom or change/locker room where students undress) is uncomfortable or inappropriate.

5. Use the student’s preferred name(s) and pronoun(s): Respecting a student’s request to change their name(s) and pronoun(s) is a key aspect of supporting and affirming that person’s identity. Students’ prior consent must be obtained before disclosing their trans or gender diverse identity to their parents/guardians. The applied protocol for contacting the home of a trans or gender diverse student is to first determine from the student an appropriate way to reference their gender identity, gender expression, name(s), and pronoun(s)

It goes on and on, but that's already more than enough to give you a good idea of what it's about.

All the documents can be accessed at Manitoba’s Education and Early Childhood Learning page.

One of the more disturbing aspects of this is how loathe many people are to even believe any of it. Of course most conservatives don't have too big a problem believing this, but anyone else seems to require a good deal of convincing for some reason. I've lost track of the number of conversations I've had on various social media regarding last week's extremely popular article. That title is Justin Trudeau Suggests 78% of Canadian Parents Are Aligned with Far-right Political Actors and Haters.

There were many accusations of this title being clickbait. I don't know if it is or not, but when reality is as whacked out as it currently is, it becomes that much more difficult to describe it in one short headline.

As soon as you say something like, “the schools are actively hiding a student’s transition from his or her parents,” you get all kinds of pushback. People demand examples and insist you're some kind of right-wing lunatic just making shit up to be angry about. The reality is, this is exactly what they're doing. When proof is offered, people still don't want to believe it and they make excuses like, “Oh, that's just federal policy and since schools are run by the provinces, it means absolutely nothing.” Well, it obviously does mean something because by some strange coincidence, the provincial schools have the exact same policies.

While I agree that federal policy should have no bearing on the way provinces decide to run their schools, we know that's not the case. If it were, New Brunswick and Saskatchewan would have had no reason to make the legislation they did.

In regards to point #5 above, it's obvious that this policy is meant to conceal a student's gender transition from thier parents. More disturbing than this is the last part which states that “The applied protocol for contacting the home of a trans or gender diverse student is to first determine from the student an appropriate way to reference their gender identity, gender expression, name(s), and pronoun(s).”

What this is implying is that the teachers are to be complicit in actively deceiving the parents about the perceived gender of their child in the school setting. No wonder many people just refuse to believe it - ten years ago I wouldn't have believed it either. The difference though, is that I would've actually checked it out, which is exactly what I did this week.

And no wonder most people don't even know about it. This doesn't exactly sound like the kind of policy any school division would be trumpeting from the rooftops for all to hear, does it? And if they have this attitude in regards to this issue, what other issues might they deem “objectively not in the best interests of the student” to inform the parents about?

Again, remember the conservative political nature of Manitoba, and then think about what the schools in your province might be like.

While I'm not sure when this change happened in the schools (no one notified me about it), I think a safe assumption is that it was around the time Bill C-16 was implemented in 2017. This bill added gender identity rights to the Human Rights Act and the Criminal Code. This was a big priority for the Trudeau government and they didn't waste a lot of time getting it done.

This is precisely what I was referencing in a piece I wrote called The Natural State of Everything. In it, I make the point that it's often the little things that are a very big deal. You may think this is a “little thing”, and if that's the case, then it's likely that you're not the parent of school-aged children for starters. Maybe another reason to think this isn't a big deal is that you believe the government always has our best interests at heart. If you believe that, then you must be new here…

When we’re talking about adults keeping secrets with other people's kids, and then actively conspiring with these kids to deceive the parents, there's a pretty major creep factor about that - hardly what I would call a “little thing”. The fact that this is endorsed and mandated by the government adds a whole new layer of creep. This ought to raise some serious questions about what their game is.

Now with these facts in mind, when you hear about the Million Person March that will be taking place on September 20th all across Canada, and you hear it called “far-right”, or “transphobic”, or whatever else, know that the vast majority of these participants (likely all of them) are part of that 80% of Canadians that don't believe the state has the right to interfere in our families. It's as simple as that. This is undoubtedly one those little things that is a huge frickin' deal, and one that will eventually be dealt with because this is not just politics anymore - this is about as personal as it gets. If you thought the Freedom Convoy was a big deal, I'm afraid you ain't seen nothin’ yet.

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